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Regarding energy/relaxation, which might initially seem like incompatible states, can you remember a time when you were excited, yet still physically loose? Maybe jumping off a diving board (which you could also do all tight and scared), or running downhill really fast and free (which also could be done tight and cautiously)?
Energy or physical activation (i.e. heart rate increase, breathing more rapidly, etc.) occurs not just when we’re scared or afraid or feeling anxious, but also when we’re excited – except that excitement is a more positive feeling and emotional state. So the idea is to search for that kind of physiological arousal, but start thinking of it as a more emotionally neutral phenomenon, and pair it with being physically loose and more at ease. That’s why it helps to remember times when we’re experienced that sort of combination – physically loose, but also very much energized, and “up”, yet not feeling anxious, per se. Does that make sense?
You might find though, that trying to find any energy when you’ve totally relaxed and calmed yourself down, is more challenging. Have you gotten to the simulation training part of the lesson yet? It might be easier to find and channel that energy when you’ve built some up by getting your heart rate up. Where you’re still physically loose, but also not totally calm and sleepy-ish.
The idea behind a focal point is to minimize visual distractions; make it easier to keep your mind quiet and focused on what you want. So if it helps to keep your eyes closed and have more of an imagined focal point where you can direct energy at the end of centering, that’s certainly fine too!